When Coach Comes Crashing Down

This column comes to you from 37,000 feet on a cross-country flight back home. Tomorrow night, a group of parents from a nationally ranked soccer team will bring down their coach who has been with them now for over 4 years. There will be hurt feelings, some anger and some poorly phrased statements from parents who are unaccustomed to speaking in groups that will damage relationships. And there will be a coach and a player, his daughter, who will have to pick up the pieces and start over again.

In previous columns I have discussed my thoughts on parents coaching their own children. Bad idea and it should not happen. Well, this personal situation has manifested into a full blown lynching. Bad decision making on the field, lack of communication or no communication with the parents, poor player placement, poor decisions regarding his daughter that should not even be playing on the team, etc. etc. etc. The club has policies regarding players that must play age appropriate. The club has policies against players double rostering. The club has policies regarding coaches spending more than 2 years with any one team. All good reasons to have a meeting and discuss how these situations must be handled. Too bad they all festered for so long. The parents will not settle for anything less than the coach stepping down. Its time. Why doesn’t he see it? He dug his heels in and is not thinking about what is best for the players and the team.
These parents spend several thousand dollars a year in dues, fees, hotels, travel expense and you can’t put a dollar amount on the time invested. Hundreds of hours. The kids all get along extremely well and the parents all get along great. Only one problem, Coach. Soccer parents are a special breed, but they also deserve the right to be heard and make group decisions regarding club teams, when the foundation of policies has not been followed. There are a lot of club executives and administrators who will disagree with my statement. Leave running the team to the club and the parents should keep their nose out of it. Wrong. However, with any club or business when the management does not adhere to sound principles of leadership, judgment and policy, then the shareholders deserve to be heard and pass judgment.

The coach is a good man and it will offer the opportunity for a fresh start for both his players and himself. His ego and pride will be hurt put his passion for the game will go on. How many coaches have been fired in how many sports over the years. They all resurface and are successful somewhere else. Most importantly they have learned valuable lessons along the way. The failure to effectively communicate in any organization is the single greatest reason they fail. Open, honest and direct communication must happen. Much of the heartache for all involved tomorrow night could have been avoided if the coach had just listened and communicated.